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Wednesday, 24 September 2008

  • Footnotes

    When I read books with footnotes, I'm jealous. I'm truly looking for the person who can literally pick me apart and analyze every piece of me and my life and tell me what it's all about. But everyone is an inevitable mystery. The very moment someone starts to figure themselves out, that's when change begins. Maybe that's the secret to controlling change. It's not that I would want to hinder myself, which I feel is exactly what a cease in change would impose, but controlling the pace of change could prove to be a rewarding power if it could be mastered, I think.

    The fact that we're constantly on a quest to discover who our real selves are is a pretty frustrating concept. We have no solid self, and the self we do have is unavoidably affected and contaminated by experience, surroundings, culture, company, and such. Nothing we are could possibly be a "true self." There is no way our person can be contributed to this concept people believe exists called a "soul." Nothing is real. It's all experience, conditioning, etc. Just like the idea of free will.

Friday, 29 August 2008

  • Corporate World = Hedonists?

    So, I was looking up hedonism on the wonderful interwebs. Wikipedia basically narrows it down to this:
       "Hedonism is the philosophy that pleasure is of ultimate importance, the most important persuit."
    So, if we look at our culture, over-all the primary concern of our country boils down to money.

    Everyone has come to this whole thought process that money=happiness. We're bombarded with this notion by pop-culture, media, school, and often our own families. That this notion of money equaling happiness would be hedonistic (because money is happiness due to the pleasure people seek to get out of what money can afford them) means that the same would technically ring true for corporations.

    Money, to the corporate world = happiness. Nothing else matters. I've worked some crap jobs and they all pretty much seem to like the corporate ethic, with the whole "right to work" thing making it so that anyone can be dropped at any time (discriminatory reasons not applying here) it seems that people really enjoy and value their pay check more than each other. In fact, it's almost encouraged to be in that mind-set with the rules of businesses that enforce separation, and maybe even dislike between employees.

    There are the common rules of the environment that subjects of the business should not talk about money, politics, or religion - which turns out to make a lot of conversation in the work-place relatively meaningless.

    So - Would all this basically make corporatism=hedonism? Is that just a long shot, or is it kind of what it boils down to? Everyone at work will talk about what they buy with their money, excited about their extremely temporary happiness, while I have to wonder about that just being one huge characteristic making a great deal of people hedonistic in some way.

Sunday, 17 August 2008

  • I like how some people ask me "where my ideas come from."

    Here's the deal. I flood my head with information. Any information. Lots of it. And I let it all slosh around in the back of my brain, in the part normal people use for remembering bills, thinking about making appointments, and remembering to do the dishes. Eventually, I have this critical mass of information. One connects to another, which connects to the next, which connects to the next - stick to it, and you've got a train reaction. A bunch of stuff knits together and lights up and you've got what's called "an idea."

    So, for that brief moment, I'm Holy. I can't be touched. Something impossible and brilliant has happened and suddenly you understand what it would be like if Einstein's brain were placed into the body of a young Tyrannosaurus Rex, stuffed full of amphetamines and sex radiation. That's what happens to me. I beam sex rays across the world and my brain is all lit up with Holy fire. If I felt like it, I could scred a million nuns and destroy their faith in Christ.

    From my chair.

    See, this is the best part about writing. It's what keeps me going. It's the wild rush of "Shit, did I just think of that?!" With all kinds of weird chemicals flowing through my brain and ideas and images and moments all opening up in my mind one right after the other, a mass of new and unrealized possibilities.

    It's a quarter to four in the afternoon, and I feel completely wired. Nobody would be safe from me right now. I could read their minds and take over their heartbeats with a glare. Faster than the speed of anyone.

    THAT is how it works.

Monday, 11 August 2008

  • Not To Mention...

    Something I'm going to mention anyway...

    Isn't it great how people will say that? "Not to mention, blah blah blah," just before they mention blah blah blah?

    It's like how possibly offensive statements are often prefaced by "No offense, but..." It's like, have some balls. Just TRY to offend me without that convenient little buffer! Rid yourself of the protective speech bubble wrap! (Oh, hello, mixed metaphor...)

    So I'll have to say now, I really give major props to anyone speaking English as a second language, because it's my first and I clearly haven't figured it out yet.

Friday, 08 August 2008

  • My Own Life

    I feel an overwhelming contentness with my life right now. It's come over me quite suddenly, but you know when you realize something? REALLY realize it, like it's not just an intellectual exercise anymore, but a feeling, a knowledge? I call it the "click." Something just "clicked" in my head just now.

    I don't have to live my life based on other peoples' standards or expectations. I don't have to compare my life to anyone else's. If I'm happy with what I'm doing and where I'm going, then anyone else's opinion is completely and utterly moot. I'm the only one who will ever live my life, and I have the right to have full control over the reins. There could be huge crowds of people thinking I'm insane and thinking that my life is somehow lesser than theirs, but I will always have the last laugh as long as I remember that my opinion of my life is the only one that matters. While everyone else is busy fitting themselves into little cardboard boxes, I will be living in my own little Technicolor prism.

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  • There's nothing interesting about me that you could learn in a few lines of text - and if you think that you can, then you're probably more superficial than you realize. A lot of these entries are from my personal pen/paper journal - and I took the time to put them here when I made my account and put the proper dates on them.

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  • skiesofarcadia
    Hey Turbo! You should keep blogging and commenting on mine! :D